A Williamsburg Conversation Reference Guide. Entry #1. The Condos.
Williamsburg is growing. People are moving here in droves, and visitors, even tourists, seem to be arriving at an alarming rate. Yet. Instead of bemoaning the newcomers, and shunning them from our presumed-to-be-insular world, I thought, Nay! Let's provide them a service. Let's help them assimilate by divulging some of the more important opinions and ideas that form the core of every self respecting Williamsburg resident. The following is the first entry in what will become a comprehensive guide to successfully engaging Williamsburg residents in conversation.
When walking around the neighborhood with residents, someone will inevitably point to a massive construction site or a towering, newly finished building that looks entirely out of place. They'll likely say something, maybe as simple as "Condos." and shake their head. They may add "they're coming up all over the place." In case it cannot be inferred from their tone, what is being implied is: How obtrusive, what terrible architecture, how artless, it's disgusting. The preferable response is a severe head shake to accompany theirs, as this indicates solidarity. A genuine, astonished "wow" is also acceptable, if executed properly, as the resident will see that you have a sincere disdain for such horrific, capitalistic enterprises. Entertain their perfunctory talk of "how it used to be" briefly, but contributing is not encouraged as this is spectacularly boring talk.






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